The Funny Stuff thread

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WPyG5mMfaN8#t=130

link

Take a bow, internet.

Take a bow, internet.

How many sex faces can you fit into 3:45?

sh*te loads.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WPyG5mMfaN8#t=130

link

Take a bow, internet.

hahah brilliant, but man do I hate that stupid song.

Germany, Austria and Italy are standing together in the middle of a pub when Serbia bumps into Austria and spills Austria’s pint.

Austria demands Serbia buy it a whole new suit because of the new beer stains on its trouser leg.

Germany expresses its support for Austria’s point of view.

Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit.

Serbia points out that it can’t afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for the cleaning of Austria’s trousers.

Russia and Serbia look at Austria.

Austria asks Serbia who it’s looking at.

Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone.

Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in doing so.

Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that its sufficiently out of order that Britain not intervene.

Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it?

Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action anymore.

Britain and France ask Germany whether it’s looking at Belgium.

Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone.

Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium.

France and Britain punch Germany. Austria punches Russia. Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other.

Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it’s on Britain’s side, but stays there. Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria.

Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings because Britain made Australia do it.

France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.

Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.

America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself.

By now all the chairs are broken and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany’s fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

The line "Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium". cracked me up.

Star Wars Prank (Rémi Gaillard)

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?" "None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away." "Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking." Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?" "Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone." "No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking."

Trevor Noah

....

https://youtube.com/watch?v=vi7SeBI7z9A

Weasel photographed riding on a woodpecker's back

Amateur photographer Martin Le-May, from Essex, has recorded the extraordinary image of a weasel riding on the back of a green woodpecker as it flies through the air.



http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-31711446

 

Weasel photographed riding on a woodpecker's back

Amateur photographer Martin Le-May, from Essex, has recorded the extraordinary image of a weasel riding on the back of a green woodpecker as it flies through the air.



http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-31711446

 

 

Aww mate that made my day!

Just practicing some penalties

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTcu43Js3rU#ws

Code: [Select]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTcu43Js3rU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uFX0JdLQ2M4#ws

Just practicing some penalties

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTcu43Js3rU#ws

Code: [Select]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTcu43Js3rU

Quality mate. Made me feel dizzy just watching it though

https://youtube.com/watch?v=0YM9Ereg2Zo

Put this in the wrestling thread already, but it probably belongs here. Don't know if I have a weird sense of humour, but I pissed myself laughing.

https://youtu.be/UkM48Kmk0yY

Anyone else seen this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_U6yOM3pnw#ws

 

Anyone else seen this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_U6yOM3pnw#ws

 

Quality this mate.

I love the commentary on the Henderson goal: "That keeper would have had more chance getting his hands on the F***ing sun"

A man takes his budgie to the vet, explaining that the poor bird wouldn't sing anymore and was starting to starve.  The vet examined the bird and said that the birds beak was too long, having grown so long the top bear curled around under the bottom beak.  It needed to be filed down so the budgie could open its moth again.  The vet gave the man a tiny file for the jog, warning to be sure that none of the beak filings fell into the birds mouth as the filings are sharp and can cause the birds lungs to bleed. The man headed home looking forward to hear his beloved bird sing again.

A week later the vet ran into the man and asked how his bird was. "Not good'" said the man. "The bird died"
"Oh that is so sad.  I did warn you about the beak filings though" said the vet.
"It wasn't that!" said the man.  "I was very careful when filing the beak, but when I took the bird out of the bench vice it was already dead!".

Before Marriage:
Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait.
Girl: Do you want me to leave?
Boy: No don't even think about it.
Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will.
Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
Boy: Never. Why are you even asking?
Girl: Will you kiss me?
Boy: Every chance I get.
Girl: Will you hit me?
Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy?
Girl: Can I trust you?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Darling!
After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

Quick shout for the note my girlfriend left for her Amazon delivery earlier today and the delivery guys reply. Could write a book on the daft things she has come out with and done over the years.

https://twitter.com/MrPrice1979/status/606878692640485376

So now we've all got your missus' address. Also, why on the note does she spell it Lindsay and her twitter Linzi?

Funny bunch you wools