When a Chelsea fan drops her kids at your house for the evening......

Some friends of ours are Chelsea fans.  They went out tonight and left their kids at our house.  I'm getting them properly attired.

lololololololo..... Quality that....  The thing is, Lil man looks like he'll go through his whole schooling life with LFC dominating the prem and CL anyway.. You wont have to do much now lad.. Future red anyway..!!..lololo..

My wife is from Kenya so we have a lot of African friends.  Seems they're all Chelsea and Arsenal fans, not a Red in the whole lot.  I have to wonder how Kenyans pick their teams.

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to F**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to F**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

F**k me billy lad.

Not an invitation by the way.

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to F**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

Moral of the story - don't F**k with Billy...

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to f**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

phew !

My wife is from Kenya so we have a lot of African friends.  Seems they're all Chelsea and Arsenal fans, not a Red in the whole lot.  I have to wonder how Kenyans pick their teams.

I know a Ghanian who supports Chelsea purely because of Essien.

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to f**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

Whatttt?? If true that's f***in shocking

In fairness to billy I've got an ex who I'd do worse to and therefore her associates would be classed as collateral damage.

Moral of the story - don't f**k with Billy...

Especially if your a dirty f***in manc bi*ch who thinks it funny to put their scummy f***in sh*t on my sons back!!

YNWA

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to F**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

Get in Billy - my braw from anaw maw. 

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to f**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

 

Brilliant.

Cant stop laughing ....

+ 1 Billy.

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to f**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

Billythered?!

No

Billybigbollocks!

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to f**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

I wonder if Chris Martin has done this to Gwyneth Paltrow yet???

I wonder if Chris Martin has done this to Gwyneth Paltrow yet???

I don't think he'd wanna get in 'Trouble'.

I'll get me coat.

I don't think he'd wanna get in 'Trouble'.

I'll get me coat.

*Shiver(s)

 

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to F**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

Fair enough! Personally I would have hired a transit van, waited until it was dark, put on a Jason mask then pulled her into the back of the van.
From there I would have tied her up with cable ties, and driven her to an abandoned house deep in the countryside where I would have hung her upside down by the feet, and tortured her for 3 days before letting rats feed on her face!

Or is that a bit much? 

My ex (bi*ch) took our son who was 3 over to her mates house, she is a dirty manc bi*ch, after a hour or so I received  pic text showing my lad wearing a scum shirt , I went f***in ballistic, I phoned her, my ex, told her to get that f***in sh*t off my sons back or don't bother coming home ,
Later that week I was passing manc bi*ch's house where I spotted her car, it was adorned with manc sh*t stickers N stuff ,

I'm a bad man me, 
I punctured two tyres let the air out of another, snapped off wing mirror offside, ran my key down either side scatched to f**k and threw some clutch fluid over the bonnet, 
next day she's on the phone telling bi*ch all about it, after she says to me some b***ard had vandalised her car, oh that's f***in terrible I said, lmao inside, 

Revenge tastes so sweet sometimes 

YNWA

Can't believe so many got so huffy about this Billy, it's a perfectly normal reaction to a thoroughly despicable act 

Fair enough! Personally I would have hired a transit van, waited until it was dark, put on a Jason mask then pulled her into the back of the van.
From there I would have tied her up with cable ties, and driven her to an abandoned house deep in the countryside where I would have hung her upside down by the feet, and tortured her for 3 days before letting rats feed on her face!

Or is that a bit much? 

I would sue you for being cruel to animals , how could you leave those poor rats to feed on that sh*t , you should be ashamed of yourself you naughty man !

YNWA

I would sue you for being cruel to animals , how could you leave those poor rats to feed on that sh*t , you should be ashamed of yourself you naughty man !

YNWA

Sorry Billy your concern is understandable but undomesticated rats will feed on any old sh*t, literally.