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      Chelsea

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      stuey
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #161: Aug 22, 2011 06:51:53 pm
      It's not confirmed until Mac_Red comes in with his F***ing articles. :D
      Hahaha.
      corballyred
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #162: Aug 22, 2011 06:53:34 pm
      Top top signing, baring Alves, Messi and Xavi no one has more assists in La Liga in the last 3 years. Other than Suarez I think Silva is the top foreign player in England Chelsea are getting a lad of similar quality here.
      ayrton77
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #163: Aug 22, 2011 07:20:34 pm
      Top top signing, baring Alves, Messi and Xavi no one has more assists in La Liga in the last 3 years.

      Top, top, top, top signing IMO.
      racerx34
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #164: Aug 22, 2011 07:24:43 pm
      No he's a top top top top top signing. Mark my words
      Court LFC
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #165: Aug 23, 2011 11:36:50 am
      Didn't look overly impressive when I nipped down to watch us against Valencia the other week.

      Downing looked a lot better on the wing for our style of play. Although I'm annoyed Chelsea have signed him.

      Came out of nowhere this.
      Dannylfc
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #166: Aug 23, 2011 11:38:08 am
      I think hes going to be sh*t. Worst signing in premier league history.


      linneman
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #167: Aug 23, 2011 12:06:56 pm
      I think hes going to be sh*t. Worst signing in premier league history.



      Wrong, that's Andy Carroll   :f_whistle:
      Dadorious
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #168: Aug 23, 2011 02:25:48 pm
      Undoubtedly one of the best young players going around but another greedy c**t.

      Enjoy Roman's pennies. May you never win anything wearing the Chelsea colours.
      macca8
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #169: Aug 23, 2011 03:23:39 pm
      From one CL runners-up to another. Well, you're making history Mata, moving from a club with a history to a club with less history.
      Red5man
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #170: Aug 23, 2011 05:57:11 pm
      Undoubtedly one of the best young players going around but another greedy c**t.

      Enjoy Roman's pennies. May you never win anything wearing the Chelsea colours.

      Remind me how he's greedy again?
      Macedonian_Red
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #171: Aug 24, 2011 12:01:01 am
      Chelsea make their move for £15m Pereira as Mata deal inches closer

      Last updated at 10:45 PM on 23rd August 2011

      Chelsea have made their opening bid of £15million for Porto's Alvaro Pereira as they look to finalise the signing of Juan Mata.

      Sportsmail revealed Chelsea's interest in the Uruguay international wing back Pereira but his buy-out clause is £25million.

      Former Porto manager Andre Villas-Boas has gone back to his old club for the hardworking and versatile left-sided star and may offer a player as part of any deal for Pereira.

      Mata, meanwhile, was in London on Tuesday before returning to Valencia to say his goodbyes and the deal is expected to be confirmed on Wednesday.

      Chelsea are also close to signing Mexico striker Ulises Davila, 20, in a £2.5m deal that would see him loaned to Dutch club Vitesse Arnhem for a season as he does not qualify for a work permit.

      Chelsea are still looking to offload Yossi Benayoun, with Roma and Spurs showing interest in the Israeli midfielder, while Juventus are considering a deal for defender Alex.

      Slobodan Rajkovic should finalise his £2m move to Hamburg after the 22-year-old Serb was told he is unlikely to secure a UK work permit, even on appeal.

      http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2029351/Chelsea-bid-15m-Portos-Alvaro-Pereira.html

      Chelsea make £17m bid for Porto wing-back Alvaro Pereira but Luka Modric move remains uncertain

      By Jason Burt
      23 Aug 2011

      Chelsea have submitted a €20 million (£16.6 million) bid to sign Porto wing-back Alvaro Pereira as another of their targets, Luka Modric, was told by Tottenham Hotspur will not be released for international duty if he does not play for them at home against Manchester City on Sunday.

      André Villas-Boas, the Chelsea manager, wants Pereira, as first revealed by Telegraph Sport, and Modric to join £27 million signing Juan Mata before the transfer window closes next week.

      If Villas-Boas signs the trio it means Chelsea will spend more than £73 million in the final days of the window in what amounts to a huge statement of intent from Roman Abramovich.

      A £30 million bid, the third Chelsea have made, was submitted for Modric on Sunday with the midfielder having already told Spurs manager Harry Redknapp that he was not in the “right state of mind” to play for his present club and did not want to appear for them again.

      Modric missed Monday’s Premier League match at Manchester United and is not set to feature in tomorrow’s Europa League play-off against Hearts — if he did play he would be cup-tied for the Champions League ending his hopes of joining Chelsea.

      However, Spurs are understood to have informed Modric that if he does not make himself available for the City game this weekend then he cannot join up with the Croatian national team. Croatia have crucial Euro 2012 qualifiers away to Malta and at home to Israel next month with Modric desperate to play for his country.

      Spurs’ stance has left the 25 year-old in a dilemma especially as Redknapp is sympathetic to his situation and has already suggested that it may be best for all parties if Modric is sold. Tottenham chairman Daniel Levy, however, is adamant he will not negotiate at any price and there is a rift between him and Modric.

      Chelsea are unlikely to make a fourth offer for Modric and have now bid for Pereira, a key target for Villas-Boas who is finally set to raid his former club. Pereira is regarded as a direct replacement for Yuri Zhirkov, who was sold to Russian club Anzi Makhachkala, and can provide cover for Ashley Cole as well as play in midfield.

      It is understood that although Pereira has a €30 million buy-out clause in his contract, Porto are willing to sell for lower having already signed the 25 year-old’s replacement, Alex Sandro. There is less pressure for Porto to sell, however, following the deal they struck for Radomel Falcao to join Atletico Madrid.

      Chelsea’s interest in Pereira may surprise supporters — it would not appear to be a priority position — and would also raise further doubts over the future of Florent Malouda as well as that of Yossi Benayoun, who is available for transfer. However Villas-Boas believes Pereira would make a big difference to his squad.

      Chelsea will complete the £27 million signing of Mata from Valencia this week with another of their recent recruits, former Barcelona B midfielder Oriol Romeu, hailing the signing yesterday.

      “He’s a wonderful player who can contribute a lot to the team,” Romeu said of the Spanish international. “I think he will settle in really well.

      "He’s a good quality player. He has the technique to make it in the Premier League, and is physically good.”

      Last night Porto sources indicated the club would reject Chelsea's opening offer for Pereira.

      http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/chelsea/8718953/Chelsea-make-17m-bid-for-Porto-wing-back-Alvaro-Pereira-but-Luka-Modric-move-remains-uncertain.html
      « Last Edit: Aug 24, 2011 01:07:02 am by Macedonian_Red »
      Roddenberry
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #172: Aug 24, 2011 01:34:20 am
      Chelsea make their move for £15m Pereira as Mata deal inches closer

      Last updated at 10:45 PM on 23rd August 2011

      Chelsea have made their opening bid of £15million for Porto's Alvaro Pereira as they look to finalise the signing of Juan Mata.

      Sportsmail revealed Chelsea's interest in the Uruguay international wing back Pereira but his buy-out clause is £25million.

      Former Porto manager Andre Villas-Boas has gone back to his old club for the hardworking and versatile left-sided star and may offer a player as part of any deal for Pereira.

      Mata, meanwhile, was in London on Tuesday before returning to Valencia to say his goodbyes and the deal is expected to be confirmed on Wednesday.

      Chelsea are also close to signing Mexico striker Ulises Davila, 20, in a £2.5m deal that would see him loaned to Dutch club Vitesse Arnhem for a season as he does not qualify for a work permit.

      Chelsea are still looking to offload Yossi Benayoun, with Roma and Spurs showing interest in the Israeli midfielder, while Juventus are considering a deal for defender Alex.

      Slobodan Rajkovic should finalise his £2m move to Hamburg after the 22-year-old Serb was told he is unlikely to secure a UK work permit, even on appeal.

      http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2029351/Chelsea-bid-15m-Portos-Alvaro-Pereira.html

      Chelsea make £17m bid for Porto wing-back Alvaro Pereira but Luka Modric move remains uncertain

      By Jason Burt
      23 Aug 2011

      Chelsea have submitted a €20 million (£16.6 million) bid to sign Porto wing-back Alvaro Pereira as another of their targets, Luka Modric, was told by Tottenham Hotspur will not be released for international duty if he does not play for them at home against Manchester City on Sunday.

      André Villas-Boas, the Chelsea manager, wants Pereira, as first revealed by Telegraph Sport, and Modric to join £27 million signing Juan Mata before the transfer window closes next week.

      If Villas-Boas signs the trio it means Chelsea will spend more than £73 million in the final days of the window in what amounts to a huge statement of intent from Roman Abramovich.

      A £30 million bid, the third Chelsea have made, was submitted for Modric on Sunday with the midfielder having already told Spurs manager Harry Redknapp that he was not in the “right state of mind” to play for his present club and did not want to appear for them again.

      Modric missed Monday’s Premier League match at Manchester United and is not set to feature in tomorrow’s Europa League play-off against Hearts — if he did play he would be cup-tied for the Champions League ending his hopes of joining Chelsea.

      However, Spurs are understood to have informed Modric that if he does not make himself available for the City game this weekend then he cannot join up with the Croatian national team. Croatia have crucial Euro 2012 qualifiers away to Malta and at home to Israel next month with Modric desperate to play for his country.

      Spurs’ stance has left the 25 year-old in a dilemma especially as Redknapp is sympathetic to his situation and has already suggested that it may be best for all parties if Modric is sold. Tottenham chairman Daniel Levy, however, is adamant he will not negotiate at any price and there is a rift between him and Modric.

      Chelsea are unlikely to make a fourth offer for Modric and have now bid for Pereira, a key target for Villas-Boas who is finally set to raid his former club. Pereira is regarded as a direct replacement for Yuri Zhirkov, who was sold to Russian club Anzi Makhachkala, and can provide cover for Ashley Cole as well as play in midfield.

      It is understood that although Pereira has a €30 million buy-out clause in his contract, Porto are willing to sell for lower having already signed the 25 year-old’s replacement, Alex Sandro. There is less pressure for Porto to sell, however, following the deal they struck for Radomel Falcao to join Atletico Madrid.

      Chelsea’s interest in Pereira may surprise supporters — it would not appear to be a priority position — and would also raise further doubts over the future of Florent Malouda as well as that of Yossi Benayoun, who is available for transfer. However Villas-Boas believes Pereira would make a big difference to his squad.

      Chelsea will complete the £27 million signing of Mata from Valencia this week with another of their recent recruits, former Barcelona B midfielder Oriol Romeu, hailing the signing yesterday.

      “He’s a wonderful player who can contribute a lot to the team,” Romeu said of the Spanish international. “I think he will settle in really well.

      "He’s a good quality player. He has the technique to make it in the Premier League, and is physically good.”

      Last night Porto sources indicated the club would reject Chelsea's opening offer for Pereira.

      http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/chelsea/8718953/Chelsea-make-17m-bid-for-Porto-wing-back-Alvaro-Pereira-but-Luka-Modric-move-remains-uncertain.html


      BOGOF I see.  FFS, one would have done the job. Oh and again, BOGOF.
      Dadorious
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #173: Aug 24, 2011 01:37:58 am
      Remind me how he's greedy again?

      Held out interest from other clubs until Chelsea came in and blew them out off the water with their wages.

      Adryan
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #174: Aug 24, 2011 01:52:52 am
      That's why now I think Kenny never wanted him in the first place. He may be a good player but attitude wise, he just doesn't have it to be a Liverpool player.

      Chelsea seem desperate for players now, approaching the last week of the window. Guess AvB must have thought his squad was good enough.
      macca8
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #175: Aug 24, 2011 10:04:10 am
      Complaining how Manc Citeh spending like crazy and now he's doing it as well!
      Macedonian_Red
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #176: Aug 24, 2011 11:02:38 pm

      Chelsea to up Alvaro Pereira offer amid Florent Malouda speculation

      • Chelsea to increase initial £16.6m bid for Porto defender
      • Juventus general director claims interest in Malouda

      Dominic Fifield
      Wednesday 24 August 2011

      Chelsea are to lodge an improved bid for Alvaro Pereira after Porto rejected an opening offer of £16.6m for the Uruguay international, with the Londoners considering selling Florent Malouda to Juventus for a knockdown fee as they continue to reshape their squad.

      Pereira, who can operate on the left of defence or midfield, would be a direct replacement for the departed Yuri Zhirkov at Stamford Bridge following the Russian's sale to Anzhi Makhachkala. Porto have already signed the 25-year-old's replacement, Alex Sandro, at the Estádio Dragão but will still seek a fee closer to the £26m release clause in the South American's contract.

      Chelsea are confident that the player will be reunited with André Villas-Boas before next Wednesday's deadline, though – with the Spain international Juan Mata having now completed his £23.5m arrival from Valencia on a five-year deal – Pereira's signing would necessitate the trimming of the squad to comply with the Premier League's 25-man rule. Yossi Benayoun is effectively available for transfer but, at present, Malouda appears the likeliest first-team player to move on.

      The France international scored Chelsea's winning goal against West Bromwich Albion on Saturday, but his desire to be offered a contract extension to 2014 – expressed publicly this summer – has not prompted a response from the club, with reports in Italy suggesting Chelsea are ready to offload the 31-year-old, a £13.5m signing from Lyon in 2007, to Juventus for as little as £5m. The Italian club's general director, Giuseppe Marotta, was quoted on Wednesday night claiming the Frenchman was "definitely an interesting player", with the club seeking to complete their transfer business ahead of the start of the Serie A season.

      There remains the scope for further departures from Stamford Bridge. Slobodan Rajkovic has completed a £2m move to Hamburg on a four-year deal, while the Brazil centre-half Alex has also attracted interest at Juve and the England Under-21 international Ryan Bertrand may seek first-team football elsewhere. Yet Chelsea still aspire to securing Luka Modric from Tottenham Hotspur before next week's deadline despite Spurs' position appearing increasingly entrenched on a player who has five years to run on his contract at White Hart Lane.

      http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/aug/24/alvaro-pereira-chelsea-florent-malouda
      kevinho
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #177: Aug 25, 2011 12:00:30 am
      Read some snippets from Lukaku's introduction to the press. While I hope he achieves zero success with that crap squad, the quotes make him seem like an intelligent, nice kid. Too bad he went there and ruined it all :D
      macca8
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #178: Aug 25, 2011 10:05:54 am
      Intelligence is when you said the right thing and do the right thing...he said the right thing but did the wrong thing...obvious stupidity ;D!
      racerx34
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #179: Aug 25, 2011 03:42:52 pm
      Liverpool - Chelsea CL SF 2005 ATMOSPHERE

      Chelsea fan's lyrical response to YNWA...

      We are the champions. Constant Repeat.

      The force is Weak in those fans
      Macedonian_Red
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #180: Aug 26, 2011 02:09:10 pm

      Porto stand firm on Pereira
      Chelsea told to match Uruguayan's release clause

      Last Updated: August 26, 2011

      Porto president Jorge Nuno Pinto da Costa is adamant Chelsea target Alvaro Pereira will not be leaving for less than his release clause.

      Chelsea boss Andre Villas-Boas is keen to raid his former club to add the Uruguay international to his squad before the transfer window closes.

      Pereira, who can play at left-back or on the left of midfield, has already been the subject of a failed £15million bid from the Blues.

      Pinto da Costa says he quickly rejected the offer and Villas-Boas has acknowledged the two clubs are currently far apart in their valuations of Pereira.

      The player has a €30million (£26.5m) release clause and Pinto da Costa is adamant Pereira will not be leaving until that figure is met.

      "Chelsea made us an offer for Pereira, but it took just 30 seconds to turn it down," said Pinto da Costa.

      "Every player who has an escape clause in his contract can leave if somebody makes us an offer that matches that fee.

      "But for Pereira, that escape clause is €30million."

      http://www.skysports.com/story/0,19528,12876_7125349,00.html
      Macedonian_Red
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #181: Aug 30, 2011 11:48:21 pm

      Chelsea agree £20m deal for Porto wing back

      Published 23:01 30/08/11
      By Darren Lewis

      Porto star Alvaro Pereira is set to get his dream move to Chelsea today.

      The Blues last night agreed a £20million fee for the 25-year-old wing-back, who played alongside Luis Suarez in Uruguay's Copa America triumph.

      Porto president Pinto da Costa ruled that the player was kept out of the club's Super Cup defeat to Barcelona last week to ensure today's deal was not jeopardised.

      http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/news/Chelsea-sign-Porto-Alvaro-Pereira-20million-article793377.html
      Macedonian_Red
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #182: Aug 31, 2011 09:04:06 am

      Sky Sports: "Alvaro Pereira's agent has confirmed Porto and Chelsea are in discussions over a big-money deadline day transfer, although nothing has been agreed" ...


      Telegraph: "Chelsea bid for Racing Genk's Kevin de Bruyne" ...
      Red5man
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      Re: The Official Laugh at Chelsea Thread
      Reply #183: Aug 31, 2011 11:22:54 pm
      Thanks for the 70m, Chavski tw*ts.

      Benayoun already moved on. Torres 1 goal in 22 matches. Now the softest c**t in the league joins up.

      As I said, thanks.

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