London Bridge Is Falling Down
As the lads made their way down south to face Chelsea's School it seemed like a lot of them were in a joyful mood.
Carragher: "London Bridge is fallin' down."
Darby: "Fallin' down"
Hyypia: "Fallin' down."
Carragher: "London Bridge is fallin' down."
Spearing: "Poor old Chelsea."
Gerrard: "Build it up with LFC."
Agger: "LFC."
Lee: "LFC."
Gerrrd: "Build it up with LFC."
Spearing: "Poor old Chelsea."
Carragher: "That's the spirit lads, lets give these southern flash bas**rds a right good 'idin'."
Spearing: "Too right and we will ye know why?"
Hyypia: "Cos we are the Scousers."
Carragher: "The kings of the north."
Gerrard: "We hate Man United."
Darby: "And City of course."
Agger: "We only drink whiskey."
Lee: "And bottles of brown."
Spearing: "You better watch out."
All: "Cos there's Scousers in town."
Alonso: "We hate Nottingham Forest."
Reina: "We hate Everton to."
All: "They're sh*t."
Riera: "We hate Man United."
All: "But Liverpool we love you."
There's plenty of laughs and cheers before Jamie Carragher broke the silence with his bouncing for the school's absentee friend.
Carragher: "His armband proved he was a Red."
All: "Torres, Torres."
Carragher: "You'll never walk alone it said."
All: "Torres, Torres."
Carragher: "We bought the lad from sunny Spain. Give him the ball he'll score again."
All: "Fernando Torres. Liverpool's number 9."
By the time the song finished, the entire bus was bouncing.
Benitez: "I'm really happy to see you all in such a happy mood."
Reina: "What song is that?"
There was another round of laughter.
Hyypia: "We 'ave to be don't we sir. I mean it's those Chelsea cu*ts. If you can't get up for that then there's no point bein' involved with the world's greatest club is there."
Kuyt: "Iz right blood."
Hyypia looked confused at Kuyt before beginning the song.
Hyypia: "L is for league is it number 19?
Carragher: "I for invicinble know what I mean."
Reina: "V is for victory."
Gerrard: "E ever more."
Spearing: "R is for Reds and we're ready to score."
Darby: "P is for Paisley what more can we say?"
Agger: "Double O L. Liverpool's on it's way."
All: "Whoaaa, whoaaa, Liverpool we're never gonna stop. With you all behind us we just can't be beat, shout no surrender don't mention defeat. The long road to glory is trod on by few. There's no turning back, we'll win it for you."
There was a moment of silence as the lads tried to get their breath back.
Spearing: "Come on what's next?"
Carragher: "How about...My Liverpool."
Spearing: "The Kop will always rule."
Darby: "Come and join us."
Gerrard: "We're gonna show how football's played."
Benitez: "I think that's enough singing for now."
Hyypia: "Is it F**k."
Pennant: "Rafa." Pennant waved his arms in the air to ge the rest of the bus singing along.
All: "Rafael."
Pennant: "Rafa."
All: "Rafael."
Pennant: "Rafa."
All: "Rafael."
Benitez: "Rafael Benitez."
Mr Benitez sat down with a huge smile on his face while the lads began talking among themselves and the songs stopped.
Gerrard: "I wish it could be like this every week."
Carragher: "Aye me to lad, don't why it isn't."
Spearing: "I think some of them can only get up for the big games."
Gerrard: "Every F***ing game is big for this club."
Spearing: "I know that. I'd run through a brick wall for this club."
Reina: "Others wouldn't even sh*t a brick for the club."
Hyypia: "Anyone in particular Pep."
Reina: "Nah, but there's a few. Don't sweat blood for the cause."
Gerrard: "They will when I'm F***ing done with them."
Carragher: "They need to remember who they're playin' for."
Gerrard stood up and moved to the front of the bus.
Gerrard: "Now listen you lot, I know for some of you this is a stepping block or just another club but for me and and every other fan of this club this is their life. They live, eat and sleep Liverpool Football Club so you better put your bollocks on the line for this club. Remember who you're playing for, you're not playing for some mickey mouse second rate outfit, you're playing for the best fans in the world and the biggest name in world football. That's right, you're playing for those fans. Those fans pay your F***ing wages, remember that. So next time you care more about poncing around with your hair instead of going in for a tackle you can't even win, just remember those fans. Remember what they've had to put up with and remember how much they put into this club compared to how much we take out. They give their whole hearted support, so we deserve to give them our whole hearted effort, starting with these southern cu*ts today. Let's not worry about them though, let them worry about us. I mean who the F**k are they? A team who became a challenge due to an open cheque book of some Russian pr**k, we're Liverpool Football Club, a team that's built on pride, love and loyalty. We were winning trophies when Ambrovich didn't have to ha'pennies to rub together. We were winning trophies when we had the best players in the world not money grabbing bas**rds like this lot. So don't you dare fail to give 100% today because if you do, I'll personally kick the sh*t out of you. Are you with me?"
Carragher: "I am skip."
Spearing: "Me too."
Reina: "And me."
There was a roar of cheers and people saying they were with their skipper who made his way back to his seat.
Lucas: "Well said Steven."
Gerrard: "I hope you were taking notice."
Lucas: "Oh I was and I agree Carragher doesn't put in enough effort. Not like me."
Carragher: "You long 'aired piece of sh*t. Wait till we get off the bus."
Lucas: "Excuse me?"
Gerrard: "Lucas, nobody in the side puts more effort in than Carra and certainly not you."
Lucas: "But I try my best."
Reina: "Well your best isn't good enough for this club, go sign for Newcastle or Spurs. Or better still sign for Everton."
Benitez: "Whose swearing on my bus?"
Benayoun: "It was Reina sir."
Spearing: "F**k off ye grass, you could do with putting some more effort in."
Riera: "Si si."
Kuyt: "Wellz at least hez gettingz a game."
Spearing: "Only because he's a grass. Probably the one you're smokin'."
Dossena: "Mmmmmm Smokey Bacon."
Carragher: "I can't wait to kick the sh*t outta 'im." Carragher points at Dossena.
Hyypia: "Or 'im." Hyypia points at Aurelio.
Agger: "Or him." Agger points at Mr Pelligrino.
Gerrard: "What the F**k does he do anyway?"
Carragher: "Tries to tell me how to defend."
Spearing: "Despite the fact he was sh*t and you're boss Carra?"
Carragher: "Yeah he can teach me things obviously."
Gerrard: "F**k him, when I'm manager he's gone. John Aldridge is my assistant."
Hyypia: "With Steve McMahon."
Reina: "And Tommy Smith."
Spearing: "Some bench that'd be. Stevie, Carra, Aldo, Thommo, Sam Lee, Macca and Iron Man."
The lads continued to debate their future back room staff.
Benitez: "OK lads we're nearly there."
Carragher: "You remember the words this time El Zhar?"
El Zhar: "Yes I do."
Gerrard: "Good."
The lads broke into You'll Never Walk Alone which was sung with such passion.
Reina: "There's the Chelsea shits look."
Gerrard: "Eh Frank, Sayers asked for their rolls back."
Lampard: "Origional."
Gerrard: "No the bacon ones you fat b***ard."
Reina: "Eh Cech, wrong sport mate. The rugby that's way." Reina pointed to his left.
Cech: "I wear it for protection as you well know."
Reina: "Shame your dad didn't when shagging your mum."
The lads broke into hysterics.
Pennant: "Ash I shagged your bird."
Riera: "Who hasn't? I've been here only a few months and I've got me leg over her."
Reina: "Fat Frank hasn't, only thing he gets his leg over is the stools at KFC."
Carragher: "Eh John, you ever tried pickin' on me?"
Terry literally sh*t himself and had to run into the changing rooms.
Hyypia: "Here's Lord Percy. Invented any more gold Ricky?"
Agger: "Leave off it Sam, he couldn't even invent green."
Carvalho: "Que?"
Bridge: "There talking about a show called Blackadder Rick, don't worry."
Hyypia: "Here's Baldrick. Your first name is Sod Off not Wayne."
Agger: "Yeah Sod Off Bridge."
Agger and Hyypia fell about laughing while Bridge entered the Chelsea changing room shaking his head.
Carragher: "Watch out Didier here's a gush of wind."
Drogba fell to the floor lack a sack of spuds.
Spearing: "Six point five."
Darby: "Six."
Gerrard: "Three point five."
Carragher: "A broken nose."
The Liverpool players entered their changing room after abusing every one of the Chelsea cu*ts.
The final part of this episode can be seen later today on Sky Sports 1.
« Last Edit: Oct 26, 2008 12:52:57 am by dunlop_liddell_shankly »
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