Help Would Be Much Appreciated!

I'm not expecting this topic to take off and become a hit and be the most successful but replies would be appreciated because I have one hell of an itchy ear!


Key Facts:

- The right ear

- Itch is right down in

- It hurts from prodding and attempting to scratch it

- My hair is long and goes in my ear for some unknown reason (might have an effect?)

- I am able to hear perfectly out of it


If anyone has any ideas of how I can stop it itching then I would appreciate it because the conclusion I came to is that it is the start of Swine Flu.

Oh and if any wise guy says "Scratch it" then I will have no choice but to call you a mong.


EDIT:

Reference for JD: I am not putting piss in my ear or anything along them lines.

However, i will consider Jam providing it is the bitless jam.

You need to get somebody to wee on it.

Like a jellyfish sting.

You need to get somebody to wee on it.

Like a jellyfish sting.

i'l pass on that one but keep the suggestions coming people because i am border line prodding it again.

Stick an earplug in it an give yourself some form of punishment if you take it out. Like whipping.

it will be a recovering boil or something, .....

damn!, get your hair cut hippy....
messing,

drink plenty of stella, your face and sometimes head goes numb!

Cut your ear off, put it in the fridge for two hours, take it back out then put it in your pocket. Then go to bed. When you wake up, go buy a car, drive to the beach and pick up a sea shell and put it where your ear used to be.

That should sort the itching.

Whatever you do!! Don't be sticking things down your ear to scratch it. You'll do your ear drum in or poke wax down there! When did it start itching? Have you been swimming lately?

Cut your ear off, put it in the fridge for two hours, take it back out then put it in your pocket. Then go to bed. When you wake up, go buy a car, drive to the beach and pick up a sea shell and put it where your ear used to be.

How random is that !!!  Cut your ear off and then buy a car !!!   

Go to the docs 7KK7 and have it syringed, that should help.

What you could do now is to put some warm olive oil in your ear, and a bit of cotton wool to stop it from coming out, if there is some blockage, that should loosen it.

Good luck !

Cut your ear off, put it in the fridge for two hours, take it back out then put it in your pocket. Then go to bed. When you wake up, go buy a car, drive to the beach and pick up a sea shell and put it where your ear used to be.

That should sort the itching.

Whatever you do!! Don't be sticking things down your ear to scratch it. You'll do your ear drum in or poke wax down there! When did it start itching? Have you been swimming lately?

I'm liking the shell idea fella!

Started itching yesterday evening.

With regards to swimming lately; Are you crazy?! swimming on the Isle of Wight?! Would probably catch aids from the water or something.

With regards to swimming lately; Are you crazy?! swimming on the Isle of Wight?! Would probably catch aids from the water or something.

 

It sounds (I'm here Tuesdays and Thursdays, thank you) as though a trip to the quacks is probably best mate. It's probably just a bit of dry skin or something. But best to get it checked out.

Do you have any allergies? When my hayfever kicks in, I get itchy eyes, itchy tongue, itchy ears, itchy nose...my head is just one big itch.

How random is that !!!  Cut your ear off and then buy a car !!!  

Buy a jumbo jet and then bury all your clothes....

It sounds (I'm here Tuesdays and Thursdays, thank you) as though a trip to the quacks is probably best mate. It's probably just a bit of dry skin or something. But best to get it checked out.

Do you have any allergies? When my hayfever kicks in, I get itchy eyes, itchy tongue, itchy ears, itchy nose...my head is just one big itch.

Buy a jumbo jet and then bury all your clothes....

Haha, funny guy! Just dont let the door hit you on the way out.

I don't get hayfever, although if I had gone swimming then there's a strong possibility I would get something else.


Better than selling your Ferrari and buying a trolley.

You may have a crawly in it so go to your nearest ENT and have it checked out,don't try and solve the problem yourself you may do more harm than good.
It is probably nothing just some ear wax or the microscopic hair folicals of the inner ear which are very sensitive and my cause some discomfort.

It's probably nothing but you should get it checked out.  Don't put anything in it.  You don't have to pay for treatment in the UK although I'm not sure if this applies to the Isle of Wight.

Alternatively it could be the ear boring beetle but don't worry it will only itch for another couple of days.  After that it will reach your brain and you will die.  The itching will then stop.

The only advice I can give you is do not let a vet look at your ear.I took my mate Harry the dog to the vet to get his ears cleaned out 2 weeks ago and now poor Harry is totally deaf.I do not know what the bast*rds did to him but he is having ongoing treatment and they are not charging me.One other piece of advice is go and see a which doctor but witch doctor that is the question.

A good feed of Jack Daniels is what you need.

How's your itchy ear 7KK7?

Didn't Vinny Van Gough have the same problem? His solution was to cut off the ear.

Thankfully i woke up this morning (obviously or i wouldn't be on the forum ) and my ear was fine and has been all day.

Which is a relief because i was considering taking to it with a knife

And they lived happily ever after, the end :')

Didn't you get a sea shell like I said?

I demand your ear starts itching again!!! I thought me and Bpatel had a fellow itchy face person for a while there!!! How dare you not have an itchy ear!!

Didn't you get a sea shell like I said?

I demand your ear starts itching again!!! I thought me and Bpatel had a fellow itchy face person for a while there!!! How dare you not have an itchy ear!!

Ah my bad, what do you want me to do, shove some pepper in it?

My Brain gets itchy sometimes...

I find thinking about sandpaper  does the trick....


if it happens again, maybe you could listen to sandpaper to scratch it...

Ear Ear!

Ear today gone tomorrow