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      The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread

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      MIRO
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17520: Feb 26, 2019 10:53:22 pm
      Ole Fucks It Up.

      https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/47378753


      Ole Gunnar Solskjaer says the increased workload he is demanding of Manchester United's players is partly responsible for the recent spate of injuries.

      United could be without nine senior players for Wednesday's Premier League game at Crystal Palace.

      This includes Juan Mata, Ander Herrera and Jesse Lingard, who all injured hamstrings in the draw with Liverpool.

      "It's probably linked, yes," said United's caretaker manager, when asked about the connection.

      Under former boss Jose Mourinho, United's running statistics - both in terms of distance covered and sprints made - were some of the lowest in the Premier League.

      Solskjaer has tried to do something about that but the drive to do more has come at a cost.

      Nemanja Matic, Phil Jones, Antonio Valencia, Anthony Martial and Matteo Darmian are also out of the game at Selhurst Park, while Marcus Rashford faces a fitness test on the ankle injury he sustained in the opening minutes of Sunday's game when he was tackled by Jordan Henderson.

      Although United's overall running stats have gone down - from 108.1km per game for the entire team when Mourinho was in charge this season, to 107.7km under Solskjaer - United's total sprints under the Norwegian have increased from 98.6 to 108.6 per game.

      Solskjaer said: "When do you make the change? Do you wait until pre-season and think you will change results by not asking them to run. Or do we start now and show them what the demands of intensity are and how we want to play?

      "You have seen what I have chosen. We need to play as a Manchester United team. If you want to be a part of Manchester United, it's a survival of the fittest isn't it?"


      .... but there is no one fit left to survive Ole .

                                ;D
      racerx34
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17521: Feb 26, 2019 11:45:39 pm
      Ole Fucks It Up.

      https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/47378753


      Ole Gunnar Solskjaer says the increased workload he is demanding of Manchester United's players is partly responsible for the recent spate of injuries.

      United could be without nine senior players for Wednesday's Premier League game at Crystal Palace.

      This includes Juan Mata, Ander Herrera and Jesse Lingard, who all injured hamstrings in the draw with Liverpool.

      "It's probably linked, yes," said United's caretaker manager, when asked about the connection.

      Under former boss Jose Mourinho, United's running statistics - both in terms of distance covered and sprints made - were some of the lowest in the Premier League.

      Solskjaer has tried to do something about that but the drive to do more has come at a cost.

      Nemanja Matic, Phil Jones, Antonio Valencia, Anthony Martial and Matteo Darmian are also out of the game at Selhurst Park, while Marcus Rashford faces a fitness test on the ankle injury he sustained in the opening minutes of Sunday's game when he was tackled by Jordan Henderson.

      Although United's overall running stats have gone down - from 108.1km per game for the entire team when Mourinho was in charge this season, to 107.7km under Solskjaer - United's total sprints under the Norwegian have increased from 98.6 to 108.6 per game.

      Solskjaer said: "When do you make the change? Do you wait until pre-season and think you will change results by not asking them to run. Or do we start now and show them what the demands of intensity are and how we want to play?

      "You have seen what I have chosen. We need to play as a Manchester United team. If you want to be a part of Manchester United, it's a survival of the fittest isn't it?"


      .... but there is no one fit left to survive Ole .

                                ;D

      When you've been on the bench all season and the new coach makes you run.
      lfc across the water
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17522: Feb 27, 2019 08:32:35 am
      Reading the pre-game press conferences between Jürgen and the stand in coach, summed them both up.

      Jürgen said what he had to say, telling the journos that he has to watch his words. Meanwhile, the stand in was telling the hacks present about how much pressure we're under, and boasting about how optimistic he thinks Liverpool fans are in Norway. Apparantly, the stand in asked a resident oap to do his team talk before the game. This is the new bastrd who is barely a wet week in the job, and thinks that dealing with Bournemouth Cardiff and Fulham entitles him to get the gig permanently.
      Brian78
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17523: Mar 02, 2019 09:26:30 pm
      How did they lose Pique for so little and how did he not really get a chance at ot
      heimdall
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17524: Mar 03, 2019 08:27:34 am
      Because he’s a pr**k so matches the club well.

      Why do you say he's a pr**k? I don't rate him much as a manager, despite the fantastic run Man Utd are in, but he's a nice guy.
      Ribapuru
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17525: Mar 03, 2019 11:28:04 am
      Why do you say he's a pr**k? I don't rate him much as a manager, despite the fantastic run Man Utd are in, but he's a nice guy.
      Bang on. He's a good guy. Opposite of whisky nose, golem and Jose Moron. Ole is professional as both a footballer and a manager.
      Shabs
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17526: Mar 03, 2019 11:51:56 am
      What with the love in with Ole?
      waltonl4
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17527: Mar 03, 2019 12:25:20 pm
      What with the love in with Ole?

      apparently he is a nice bloke a nice bloke that despises LFC
      RedWilly
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17528: Mar 03, 2019 12:41:21 pm
      Why do you say he's a pr**k? I don't rate him much as a manager, despite the fantastic run Man Utd are in, but he's a nice guy.

      You wouldn’t say that if he wasn’t also Norweigan.
      heimdall
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17529: Mar 03, 2019 01:08:01 pm
      You wouldn’t say that if he wasn’t also Norweigan.

      Well he is technically still manager for my Norwegian team Molde as well ;-)
      In all seriousness he's always come across as a nice bloke and from all people who've ever met him I've never heard a bad word. Of course as an ex-manc he dislikes us, same is true for all ex-reds, so what?
      RedWilly
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17530: Mar 03, 2019 02:50:54 pm
      Well he is technically still manager for my Norwegian team Molde as well ;-)


      Well then you should be pissed off with him for forgetting you guys still expect him back, whilst he’s trying to grab himself another job. There’s always a way to look negatively at something, you just need to try hard enough :D
      Brian78
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17531: Mar 06, 2019 08:01:08 pm
      On top of being a pr*ck Ashley Young is one miserable looking c**t
      RedWilly
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17532: Mar 06, 2019 08:21:02 pm
      On top of being a pr*ck Ashley Young is one miserable looking c**t

      You would be too if a bird sh*t in your mouth and it was replayed all over YouTube.
      Brian78
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17533: Mar 06, 2019 08:34:42 pm
      You would be too if a bird sh*t in your mouth and it was replayed all over YouTube.

      I see your point
      Shabs
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17534: Mar 06, 2019 09:19:48 pm
      You would be too if a bird sh*t in your mouth and it was replayed all over YouTube.

      2 girls & a cup.. 😂
      Brian78
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17535: Mar 06, 2019 10:12:59 pm
      Fair dos to them

      PSG are some bottle jobs. Billions spent and they keep f**king up.

      No time for them in szme class as city and chelsea, as in no class
      Rush
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17536: Mar 06, 2019 11:17:32 pm
      Our 0-0 draw at OT is starting to look like a decent result.
      stuey
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17537: Mar 06, 2019 11:40:18 pm
      apparently he is a nice bloke a nice bloke that despises LFC

      He supported Liverpool when he was younger I believe
      MIRO
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17538: Mar 09, 2019 12:25:02 am
      Ole =  Fergie's Puppet On A String.
      Billy1
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17539: Mar 09, 2019 07:59:13 am
      Ole =  Fergie's Puppet On A String.

      It reminds me of goldilocks and the big bad wolf.
      Billy1
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17540: Mar 09, 2019 08:02:40 am
      He supported Liverpool when he was younger I believe

      He went bad when he got corrupted by Ferguson.I still think manure will go through a run of different managers like they did when the great Matt Busby retired.
      jimbo1962
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17541: Mar 10, 2019 05:13:45 pm
      Look it the gum chewing Olex
      MIRO
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17542: Mar 10, 2019 06:25:56 pm
      Oooooopppss .    :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
      RomaN
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17543: Mar 10, 2019 06:28:01 pm
       :lmao: :lmao:
      SM
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17544: Mar 10, 2019 07:28:25 pm
      Sky Sports News postpone all updates after planned Ole United Wankfest is ruined by lucky Arsenal team.....
      bmck
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17545: Mar 10, 2019 07:33:39 pm
      Luck ran out.
      And when the ball appeared to hit an Arsenal players hand in the box, Utd didn't get a penalty  :o
      Where's their paid up VAR when they needed it.
      RC9
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17546: Mar 10, 2019 08:05:45 pm
      Haha what a lovely weekend of football!

      The scum now need to put in a performance against City or there little rival will have all been for nothing!
      FATKOPITE10
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17547: Mar 10, 2019 08:54:36 pm
      Keith Singleton
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17548: Mar 10, 2019 09:18:45 pm
      Bout time this thread was woken  :lmao:
      stuey
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      Re: The Official: Laugh At The Mancs Thread
      Reply #17549: Mar 10, 2019 09:55:42 pm
      What a f**king holiday, Tenerife is f**king boss, seen the game and the sh*te get hammered, hi de f**king hi.

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