Your costliest errors at work

Oops , sorry bout that boss

I have just fu**ed up a piece of stone worth about a grand by reading the plan wrong and machining the undermount sink in the wrong place .

So over to you lot , can anyone beat $1000 dollars Australian for a monumental stuff up  

Potentially millions but I'm legally barred from talking about it. So I guess you're still winning! 

Potentially millions but I'm legally barred from talking about it. So I guess you're still winning! 

Sounds good.

I'm relatively good on this front. Might have fu**ed up the odd few things but I don't think it has had any real bearing. Possibly a mistake or two during audits that may have led to extra fines bit nothing substantial enough that I've been told about it.

I'd imagine I lost McDonalds a fair bit through dropped food and general doziness.

I'd imagine I lost McDonalds a fair bit through dropped food and general doziness.

Nah !! I can't believe for one minute Ross 

Hi, My name's Tom and me and my pal George have made a serious number of major F**k ups in our work.

Doesn't matter though. We just dump it on the company and all the little people suffer so, no problem for us

Threw a watermelon into the box crusher thingy when I worked at woolies does that count?

My motto in my former job was I don't make mistakes.

The boss used to say you have to break a few eggs to make an omelette.  I thought that was a typical excuse from somebody as F***ing useless as they were.

I had a colleague who worked in the same hospital department as me that made an error that led to the death of a patient.

^^^^

Jeez JD , put's my little $1000 F**k up into perspective

Not a good thing on your conscience.

Fortunately, not my conscience.

Was going to put something in here about work but after reading JDs I hate to think what could be more costly. Glad its not you that has to carry that burden

Hmm I did place an order for an additional 120 HP Desktops ( a truck full) by mistake.

They did cause a rumpus at the start as they had to sit in the warehouse for 6 weeks but were eventually offloaded.

Going the bog was mine.

Came back out an somebody had nicked the phone off the front desk. Was quite chuffed to be honest as I hated the sound of that thing.

Funny though since considering there was a computer, a radio, me phone (fair enough that is sh*t) and two charity donation boxes containing money that somebody should decide to nick an ordinary phone. That still can't even make outgoing calls. Turned out though that it was one me work "mates" trying to teach me a lesson. I was too busy laughing at the incident to take in what was being said to me by me boss when she had a go.

Hmm I did place an order for an additional 120 HP Desktops ( a truck full) by mistake.

They did cause a rumpus at the start as they had to sit in the warehouse for 6 weeks but were eventually offloaded.

Damn it, could have chucked one my way. My retro 90's pc is really struggling.

Not an error but its going to be costly, going to change all the passwords on the works computers on my last day in work. So when they open up on Thursday, no tills.     

Jan. 1995: Computing error at Fidelity's Magellan fund
"There was a big flap recently over Fidelity's Magellan fund estimating in November that they would make a $4.32/share distribution at the end of year, and then not doing so. A letter of explanation was sent to the shareholders (including me) from J. Gary Burkhead, the President of Fidelity, including the following pertinent items: "During the estimating process, a tax accountant is required to transcribe the net realized gain or loss from the fund's financial records (which were correct at all times) to a separate spreadsheet, where additional calculations are performed. The error occurred when the accountant omitted the minus sign on a net capital loss of $1.3 billion and incorrectly treated it as a net capital gain on this separate spreadsheet. This meant that the dividend estimate spreadsheet was off by $2.6 billion....

Not an error but its going to be costly, going to change all the passwords on the works computers on my last day in work. So when they open up on Thursday, no tills.     

That sounds brilliant.

Not an error but its going to be costly, going to change all the passwords on the works computers on my last day in work. So when they open up on Thursday, no tills.     

Will it not be obvious its you Gareth ? or are other workers finishing on the same day that also have access to the computers, grest idea though ! 

Will it not be obvious its you Gareth ? or are other workers finishing on the same day that also have access to the computers, grest idea though ! 

There are other people finishing on the same day Steve, so they can't pin point whoever done it. And no cameras in the office, and I will change them with the managers password, which he left in the draw.

You naughty boy Gareth 

Just found out no tills for an hour today, I love it when a plan comes together.     

Technically playing online poker is my current job/income. I lost almost 600 euros in one hand once, the b***ard got a fullhouse on the river. It's worse when it's your own money

Let us know how you get on with that Gareth!!

Probably shouldn't have posted it in here really Gareth

Smashed the bosses car up once coming home from work and he was in the passengers seat plus he already had a bad back,brand spankin'new Scirocco top of the range back in the 80's. Never got sacked but never drove his cars again total damage was about £2000 lot of money then still get reminded of it now when I bump! into him and a few of the old lads.

I used to be an apprentice mechanic when i first left school and had previously been shown how to do the job I was doing that day.
It was rebuilding a MERCEDES diesel engine for a massive earth remover, the pistons were over 12" in diameter (F***ing big in other words !).
Any how I rebuilt the entire engine, 8 cylinders, took me a full day !

The mananger came in to check my work and there's an inspection cover built into the side of the piston block to view the piston rings, which he did, (I'd fitted the wrong ones !, they weren't thick enough so the oil and fuel would mix !).
I got a written warning for it, even though I only fitted the ones they gave me to fit !, they said I should have noticed such a discrepancy in the piston ring size.

The whole engine had to be re stripped costing shed loads of money and we lost the contract for future work with the owner of the trucks !.

That was back in the late 70's.

I used to be an apprentice mechanic when i first left school and had previously been shown how to do the job I was doing that day.
It was rebuilding a MERCEDES diesel engine for a massive earth remover, the pistons were over 12" in diameter (F***ing big in other words !).
Any how I rebuilt the entire engine, 8 cylinders, took me a full day !

The mananger came in to check my work and there's an inspection cover built into the side of the piston block to view the piston rings, which he did, (I'd fitted the wrong ones !, they weren't thick enough so the oil and fuel would mix !).
I got a written warning for it, even though I only fitted the ones they gave me to fit !, they said I should have noticed such a discrepancy in the piston ring size.

The whole engine had to be re stripped costing shed loads of money and we lost the contract for future work with the owner of the trucks !.

That was back in the late 70's.

That's a lot of sh*t Steve with the pistons how were you to know? I was an apprentice fitter myself and if anything fucks up a scapegoat is the preferred option.
They would technically have a point if the components came boxed with the specification displayed but your superior should have checked it out before you got to it .

I'd forgotten about until I saw this thread !
The first bollock I dropped was with one of them mini road rollers with 2 rollers one in front of the other, with a small motor on top.
You have a long handle and direct it left or right the motor directs it back or forwards with a direction lever.
I was told to top it up with oil !, the engine being in the middle the dipstick was in a long tube which i filled to the brim of the tube rather than actully check the dipstick marking !

Sounds good.

I'm relatively good on this front. Might have fu**ed up the odd few things but I don't think it has had any real bearing. Possibly a mistake or two during audits that may have led to extra fines bit nothing substantial enough that I've been told about it.

Did you finish the apprenticeship Steve?

No Stuey mate, I worked for an engineering firm called AMCO and it was during the 80's our firm got caught up in the pit strike.
Our equipment was on hire at a lot of pits and got locked in when the strike started so we suffered through job losses and I was one of those losses, you just couldn't lay off apprentice's then without laying off a qualifed worker as well but my company laid of just enough of both in order to get rid of all the aprentices !

No Stuey mate, I worked for an engineering firm called AMCO and it was during the 80's our firm got caught up in the pit strike.
Our equipment was on hire at a lot of pits and got locked in when the strike started so we suffered through job losses and I was one of those losses, you just couldn't lay off apprentice's then without laying off a qualifed worker as well but my company laid of just enough of both in order to get rid of all the aprentices !

That's weird Steve cos I was an apprentice fitter down the pit. I remember seeing the logo AMCO on the machinery there.

Big orange machines ! which pit were you at and whereabouts are you ? just checked your profile it says liverpool we were in Yorkshire but worked all over the country, well the firm did I was based at the depot in Barnsley, my eldest daughter works for them now as an buyer !

Big orange machines ! which pit were you at and whereabouts are you ? just checked your profile it says liverpool we were in Yorkshire but worked all over the country, well the firm did I was based at the depot in Barnsley, my eldest daughter works for them now as an buyer !

Orange they were, was going to mention that but couldn't be sure if it was yellow,orange or white. The NCB used to give apprentices some time at each pit so I was all over the North West, the last one was Cronton Colliery before that I did Sutton Manor where my father worked, Bold,Parkside and Ravenhead to name a few, all closed now of course.
We used to have to dis-assemble them to be taken down below and then re-assemble them down the pit.

I think you may have been talking about dosco road headers and the like which were white, which we did rent out and you did indeed have to dismantle them in order to take them down the pit !
Our vehicles and plant hire (for use on the surface !) were actually Orange but if I remember rightly didn't everything that went underground HAVE to be white because of the dark (naturally !).

Of course Steve, obvious really.

Only wen't down the pit for the forst time a couple of years ago, here in Yorkshire they have the national mining museum nad i went with my wife, daughter mother-in-law and herpartner !
you actually go down one of the shafts and into a seam thats been made into a lifelike setting just like the viking museum in york !
I 'm told oranges we're banned because you could smell the zest from one seam to another, is that true ?

Only wen't down the pit for the forst time a couple of years ago, here in Yorkshire they have the national mining museum nad i went with my wife, daughter mother-in-law and herpartner !
you actually go down one of the shafts and into a seam thats been made into a lifelike setting just like the viking museum in york !
I 'm told oranges we're banned because you could smell the zest from one seam to another, is that true ?

Never heard that about the oranges Steve in fact a lot of the lads used to take them down below for their refreshing qualities when all you could taste was coal dust- orange zest was the last thing to worry about.
Didn't you ever go on a working face?  suppose you didn't if it was museum pit, some were only 4ft high depending on the seam thickness and other factors, the panzer would go up and down cutting the seam and the face workers on their knees shovelling coal and digging the kenches out with coal dust you couldn't see through sometimes, it was hard graft mate.

I've always said I'd never work darn' t'pit ! and you all deserved every penny you got and was fully behind any action Arthur and the lads took in order to preserve your jobs even if it cost me mine !
The museum is free mate and a great day out ! and the museum is an actual coal face with real machines and dummies in place of the workers and it shows you the changes through the years like pit ponies and women and children down the mine ! you can actually crawl through simulated seams of the size you mention !
I really would recommend a visit especially through the summer hols.

I've always said I'd never work darn' t'pit ! and you all deserved every penny you got and was fully behind any action Arthur and the lads took in order to preserve your jobs even if it cost me mine !
The museum is free mate and a great day out ! and the museum is an actual coal face with real machines and dummies in place of the workers and it shows you the changes through the years like pit ponies and women and children down the mine ! you can actually crawl through simulated seams of the size you mention !
I really would recommend a visit especially through the summer hols.

If I'm ever up there Steve with the family I will take them, I'm not sure if they have any  here.
Bet the cage doesn't drop like it used to! Used to get in and it would go easy for 100ft or so then the winder would take the brake off and it would drop, we used to laugh watching visitors or trainees do it the first time the look of terror on their faces was highly amusing, some pits were over a mile deep so a leisurely department store lift ride wasn't going to happen.They used to hit speeds of 80mph on the drop and if you had a hangover you definitely had to hold your breath and most other things!
The strike was hard and Scargill at times played straight into Thatcher's trap but the F***ing witch had to defeat the miners before she could destroy the unity of the working man and set the unions back to the dark ages.
Her thugs beat and murdered on the picket line  and used every tactic to defeat her foe, the Army and secret services played a part and of course that faithful friend of the establishment the media played a major part in assisting the Tory party, as it does now.

You and me in total harmony about the Tories then mate , I had my reservations on which side you we're coming down on when I mentioned King Arthur