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      The mental health thread

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      RedWilly
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      The mental health thread
      Feb 28, 2019 07:20:20 pm
      After reading about the discussion on KopiteLuke in the ‘whatever happened to’ thread, it touched a nerve for me on mental health having gone through my own struggles last year and thought it would be good to have a thread where anyone can come in and post what they might be struggling with to just be able to talk about it on a forum where you are unlikely to ever meet the person in ‘real life’.

      I’d had a complete breakdown at the start of last year, where I started hallucinating, thought the world was out to get me and found myself wandering the streets and got led around the city into some dodgy areas swiping my bank card for over £1000 and my cell phone robbed, along with my car keys etc. The worst wore off but for months after I wasn’t the same and was fearful of another breakdown happening and had a few panic attack’s, once at work and another time just again out and about.  I remember driving my car like a lunatic thinking I was being followed and am so grateful I didn’t have an accident.

      Thankfully (touch wood) I can now deal with anything like that in a much better manner and spot the signs, but it was triggered by suppressing a lot of emotions and unresolved issues that I was refusing to deal with and ever since I’ve become a lot more mindful of taking care of my own mental state and learning what works for me and what doesn’t. Mostly it came back to actually expressing my emotions in a healthy manner, rather than trying to live up to an ‘image’ and starting to acknowledge my own flaws and learning to let my emotion pass rather than reacting to it, although the specific issues went unresolved for years and years.

      Much more to it than that, but in hindsight, before my breakdown I was really not healthy and since I’ve worked through it I can honestly say I’ve never been happier and appreciate things a lot more than I ever did in the past. It was a real wake up call for me the breakdown and was the best thing that could have happened to me in the end. Been seeing a therapist just once a month since and the results are amazing. I’ve definitely become more of a hippy in a way :D

      No obligation to post, but like I say, it’s important I think to have a space where you can talk freely about any struggles you might be going through.
      « Last Edit: Mar 01, 2019 02:26:23 am by RedWilly »
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      Scotia
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #1: Feb 28, 2019 07:27:55 pm
      After reading about the discussion on KopiteLuke in the ‘whatever happened to’ thread, it touched a nerve for me on mental health having gone through my own struggles last year and thought it would be good to have a thread where anyone can come in and post what they might be struggling with to just be able to talk about it on a forum where you are unlikely to ever meet the person in ‘real life’.

      I’d had a complete breakdown at the start of last year, where I started hallucinating, thought the world was out to get me and found myself wandering the streets and got led around the city into some dodgy areas swiping my bank card for over £1000 and my cell phone robbed, along with my car keys etc. The worst wore off but for months after I wasn’t the same and was fearful of another breakdown happening and had a few panic attack’s, once at work and another time just again out and about.  I remember driving my car like a lunatic thinking I was being followed and am so grateful I didn’t have an accident.

      Thankfully it (touch wood) I can now deal with anything like that in a much better manner and spot the signs, but it was triggered by suppressing a lot of emotions and unresolved issues that I was refusing to deal with and ever since I’ve become a lot more mindful of taking care of my own mental state and learning what works for me and what doesn’t. Mostly it came back to actually expressing my emotions in a healthy manner, rather than trying to live up to an ‘image’ and starting to acknowledge my own flaws and learning to let my emotion pass rather than reacting to it, although the specific issues went unresolved for years and years.

      Much more to it than that, but in hindsight, before my breakdown I was really not healthy and since I’ve worked through it I can honestly say I’ve never been happier and appreciate things a lot more than I ever did in the past. It was a really wake up call for me the breakdown and was the best thing that could have happened to me in the end. Been seeing a therapist just once a month since and the results are amazing. I’ve definitely become more of a hippy in a way :D

      No obligation to post, but like I say, it’s important I think to have a space where you can talk freely about any struggles you might be going through.

      Good on you fella - both in your openness and your recovery.

      I think we all face a form of mental health crisis at times - I certainly have had periods where I know I have struggled. I think so many people put things down to a bad run or just blame the universe and never really recognise they’re not well.

      Great idea for a thread.
      RedWilly
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #2: Feb 28, 2019 07:37:09 pm
      Good on you fella - both in your openness and your recovery.

      I think we all face a form of mental health crisis at times - I certainly have had periods where I know I have struggled. I think so many people put things down to a bad run or just blame the universe and never really recognise they’re not well.

      Great idea for a thread.

      Thanks mate. Agreed on just putting things down to a bad run.

      My build up was just a series of events and trying to brush them off as if they were nothing for about a year and it all caught up with me eventually. Very thankful that I just lost a bit of cash, it really could have been a lot worse which is what scared me the most as I worked through it.

      I think the modern world really makes it hard to admit there is a problem, where you’re expected to have it all and post about it all over social media etc (although that may be more of an issue for my millennial generation).
      HScRed1
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #3: Feb 28, 2019 07:57:24 pm
      Mental health has been badly neglected not only by us as individuals  but you could argue the state through the NHS.

      With National priorities for CVD prevention, smoking cessation, cancer detection etc.

      Of course we as Brits don’t help ourselves with the old stiff upper lip attitude to talking about things which well we should be “strong and manly” about.........

      Figures for suicides in thevUK still point to 3/4 of all suicides are by males and the majority of these are through a violent nature, like hanging, jumping off a building whereas women are more likely to have a overdose via tablets or alcohol.

      So in essence women are probably likely to call out for help earlier where as for men their depression or anxiety has built up over such a time that the outcome is no longer in doubt in their mind.

      My wife’s nephew in Vancouver hung himself last summer with 2 young kids, another one who outwardly seemed so strong and full of himself but only after the event we found out about his marital problems, insecurities and fears of losing his children and with this being his second marriage how would he be seen as this “perfect person” by his family and friends.

      The importance of good Mental Health has been ignored for too long....
      RedWilly
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #4: Feb 28, 2019 08:17:31 pm
      Mental health has been badly neglected not only by us as individuals  but you could argue the state through the NHS.

      With National priorities for CVD prevention, smoking cessation, cancer detection etc.

      Of course we as Brits don’t help ourselves with the old stiff upper lip attitude to talking about things which well we should be “strong and manly” about.........

      Figures for suicides in thevUK still point to 3/4 of all suicides are by males and the majority of these are through a violent nature, like hanging, jumping off a building whereas women are more likely to have a overdose via tablets or alcohol.

      So in essence women are probably likely to call out for help earlier where as for men their depression or anxiety has built up over such a time that the outcome is no longer in doubt in their mind.

      My wife’s nephew in Vancouver hung himself last summer with 2 young kids, another one who outwardly seemed so strong and full of himself but only after the event we found out about his marital problems, insecurities and fears of losing his children and with this being his second marriage how would he be seen as this “perfect person” by his family and friends.

      The importance of good Mental Health has been ignored for too long....


      Spot on. Sorry to hear about your wife’s nephew.

      The longer things are left bottled up, the more it appears to be this unresolvable monster, when the reality is likely to not be anywhere near as bad as the convoluted scenario painted in someone’s head. These images and stereotypes that society creates is a major issue, as it creates an ideal to be lived up to, that may not be what a certain individual wants or needs but pursued anyway to satisfy others.

      It takes a shift in society’s judgement to make people feel more comfortable to be able to speak openly about anything that may be impacting them and like you say, that needs to be driven at a state level and filter down to all sections of society.
      FATKOPITE10
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #5: Feb 28, 2019 08:22:45 pm
      After reading about the discussion on KopiteLuke in the ‘whatever happened to’ thread, it touched a nerve for me on mental health having gone through my own struggles last year and thought it would be good to have a thread where anyone can come in and post what they might be struggling with to just be able to talk about it on a forum where you are unlikely to ever meet the person in ‘real life’.

      I’d had a complete breakdown at the start of last year, where I started hallucinating, thought the world was out to get me and found myself wandering the streets and got led around the city into some dodgy areas swiping my bank card for over £1000 and my cell phone robbed, along with my car keys etc. The worst wore off but for months after I wasn’t the same and was fearful of another breakdown happening and had a few panic attack’s, once at work and another time just again out and about.  I remember driving my car like a lunatic thinking I was being followed and am so grateful I didn’t have an accident.

      Thankfully it (touch wood) I can now deal with anything like that in a much better manner and spot the signs, but it was triggered by suppressing a lot of emotions and unresolved issues that I was refusing to deal with and ever since I’ve become a lot more mindful of taking care of my own mental state and learning what works for me and what doesn’t. Mostly it came back to actually expressing my emotions in a healthy manner, rather than trying to live up to an ‘image’ and starting to acknowledge my own flaws and learning to let my emotion pass rather than reacting to it, although the specific issues went unresolved for years and years.

      Much more to it than that, but in hindsight, before my breakdown I was really not healthy and since I’ve worked through it I can honestly say I’ve never been happier and appreciate things a lot more than I ever did in the past. It was a really wake up call for me the breakdown and was the best thing that could have happened to me in the end. Been seeing a therapist just once a month since and the results are amazing. I’ve definitely become more of a hippy in a way :D

      No obligation to post, but like I say, it’s important I think to have a space where you can talk freely about any struggles you might be going through.

      Good to hear mate, as someone who battles on and off it's always good to hear people finding a light in the darkness . Sometimes it's the smallest things that set me off but also the smallest things like a simple pleasure which help me feel good about myself. One day i will pluck up the courage to seek professional help but i have reached the point where i have realised what my priorities in life ara, this has helped me but still there are times i feel overwhelmed by everything and not in control of myself and my thoughts which is pretty scary.
      RC9
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #6: Feb 28, 2019 08:52:44 pm
      After reading about the discussion on KopiteLuke in the ‘whatever happened to’ thread, it touched a nerve for me on mental health having gone through my own struggles last year and thought it would be good to have a thread where anyone can come in and post what they might be struggling with to just be able to talk about it on a forum where you are unlikely to ever meet the person in ‘real life’.

      I’d had a complete breakdown at the start of last year, where I started hallucinating, thought the world was out to get me and found myself wandering the streets and got led around the city into some dodgy areas swiping my bank card for over £1000 and my cell phone robbed, along with my car keys etc. The worst wore off but for months after I wasn’t the same and was fearful of another breakdown happening and had a few panic attack’s, once at work and another time just again out and about.  I remember driving my car like a lunatic thinking I was being followed and am so grateful I didn’t have an accident.

      Thankfully it (touch wood) I can now deal with anything like that in a much better manner and spot the signs, but it was triggered by suppressing a lot of emotions and unresolved issues that I was refusing to deal with and ever since I’ve become a lot more mindful of taking care of my own mental state and learning what works for me and what doesn’t. Mostly it came back to actually expressing my emotions in a healthy manner, rather than trying to live up to an ‘image’ and starting to acknowledge my own flaws and learning to let my emotion pass rather than reacting to it, although the specific issues went unresolved for years and years.

      Much more to it than that, but in hindsight, before my breakdown I was really not healthy and since I’ve worked through it I can honestly say I’ve never been happier and appreciate things a lot more than I ever did in the past. It was a really wake up call for me the breakdown and was the best thing that could have happened to me in the end. Been seeing a therapist just once a month since and the results are amazing. I’ve definitely become more of a hippy in a way :D

      No obligation to post, but like I say, it’s important I think to have a space where you can talk freely about any struggles you might be going through.

      Glad to hear you have been able to conquer the difficulties you were having and have been able to learn from it all.

      Not sure how everyone else is but I think it is a great idea to confide in others in regards to things like this, for me personally it makes me feel like i have had a weight lifted of my shoulders. I go through periods where I feel down and I can't put my finger on why but I just don't feel like talking to anyone at the time or doing anything but after when I share that experience with others and talk about it I feel better. Recently, I have been a lot better and being able to look back on the lows and realize you know what things are good right now is great.

      I think experiencing such lows myself helps me advise friends better when they experience such issues, I have two close friends who suffer from depression and talking to them about everything and creating a dialogue about how they feel is what really hits home and helps them feel better I think.

      I personally love the idea of this thread and think it could do some real good for those who may not have previously wanted to share their 'issues' but sharing it with others works for me and if there is anything I can do to help anyone feel free to shoot me a PM.
      Roddenberry
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #7: Feb 28, 2019 09:34:47 pm
      I'm glad some are coming out after having some tough times.

      Slowly emerging from one myself. Found myself in a real dark place a few weeks ago. I'd been handing out food to the homeless in my city centre, I'd been depressed for weeks, but my public face isn't always the way I'm feeling.

      On the way home, as I stood on the train platform, I contemplated jumping.

      It's draining though, knowing you're ill, but pretending everything is fine, smiling laughing and joking around at work, but I completely withdrew from my family, I can't fake it front of them.

      I'm feeling better, but my sleeping is still a mess, I'm wiped out emotionally. It's damaged my progress from my weight loss, I've not had the energy to exercise.

      Into week 5 of my antidepressants, they are starting to help, the weather, though not today, being brighter, helped my mood, but I've ruined more than one relationship on this period, including one with a woman I'm still very much in love with, and I can't blame her, can't, in truth, blame myself, but it sucks.
      « Last Edit: Feb 28, 2019 11:45:41 pm by Roddenberry »
      RedWilly
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #8: Mar 01, 2019 01:07:09 am
      I'm glad some are coming out after having some tough times.

      Slowly emerging from one myself. Found myself in a real dark place a few weeks ago. I'd been handing out food to the homeless in my city centre, I'd been depressed for weeks, but my public face isn't always the way I'm feeling.

      On the way home, as I stood on the train platform, I contemplated jumping.

      It's draining though, knowing you're ill, but pretending everything is fine, smiling laughing and joking around at work, but I completely withdrew from my family, I can't fake it front of them.

      I'm feeling better, but my sleeping is still a mess, I'm wiped out emotionally. It's damaged my progress from my weight loss, I've not had the energy to exercise.

      Into week 5 of my antidepressants, they are starting to help, the weather, though not today, being brighter, helped my mood, but I've ruined more than one relationship on this period, including one with a woman I'm still very much in love with, and I can't blame her, can't, in truth, blame myself, but it sucks.

      Good on you mate for being open. You can’t blame anyone, it’s just the way your mind has interpreted something I guess. I remember something as a teenager where I’d had this big argument with my dad and I went off to my room and was googling how to kill myself and ended up on the samaritans website wanting to phone them but couldn’t bring myself to. Should have been a warning sign for me but I ignored it and didn’t deal with the underlying issues until my breakdown, which was over 10 years later. Crazy how you can be on a slippery slope and not even realize.

      I know what you mean about maintaining the smiles and jokes etc whilst feeling wiped emotionally underneath. I had started seeing my therapist in sessions before work and a lot of stuff came up from my childhood/teenage years that I never saw coming and I’d burst into tears and then be off to work still rocking and dwelling on the topic. It’s hard.

      I shifted a few things around my schedule to find time in the mornings after to go for a short walk in nature and ideally find a body of water to look out over for about 15 minutes as a form of meditation almost which helped me massively.

      Glad to hear you’re emerging buddy and I’m sure the people who care for you will be there on the other side once you’re ready to reconnect.
      « Last Edit: Mar 01, 2019 02:29:49 am by RedWilly »
      RedWilly
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      Re: The mental health thread
      Reply #9: Mar 01, 2019 01:21:47 am
      Good to hear mate, as someone who battles on and off it's always good to hear people finding a light in the darkness . Sometimes it's the smallest things that set me off but also the smallest things like a simple pleasure which help me feel good about myself. One day i will pluck up the courage to seek professional help but i have reached the point where i have realised what my priorities in life ara, this has helped me but still there are times i feel overwhelmed by everything and not in control of myself and my thoughts which is pretty scary.

      Good on you mate. The professional help really helped me but I had to chop and change a few times to get it right. My first therapist I found got to a lot of issues that I wasn’t even aware of and I took a break of about 3 months in the end, as I didn’t actually enjoy the dynamic between us and felt quite judged at times.

      When I started again I actually decided to go with a new therapist because I didn’t want to go back into that environment with someone where I’d had a lot of anger and went completely fresh to a new therapist with the intention of going in and being on the front foot and explaining from my perspective. Really helped me and probably the best thing I did.

      If you’ve got to a place though where you now your priorities then that’s a great place and foundation to work from.

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