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      Players Half-Term Report

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      HampshireRed
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      Players Half-Term Report
      Jan 23, 2010 09:51:47 am
      I thought it might be a little bit of fun to write a Half - Term report on the Reds and the squad. There are individual threads but this would show them all together with a grade like we used to get at school.


      Teacher Raphael Benitez - Meticulous attention to detail, tends to make his point to the class by excessive use of fingers. Has been known to criticise other teachers.  C+
      1   Diego Cavalieri   - A quiet but capable pupil.
      2   Glen Johnson   - Flamboyant member of the class. Sports an interesting hair style. Tends to prefer it at the front of the class
      4   Alberto Aquilani  - Held back by the teacher he has started to show some promise in recent weeks
      5   Daniel Agger   - A confident young man who has a passion for body art. Bags of potential and a sweet left foot
      8   Steven Gerrard   - A local lad who has attended the school for his whole life. Currently away sick but we are looking forward to welcoming him back
      9   Fernando Torres   - Very athletic, prone to temper tantrums. Sits at the front of the class and is often seen playing alone
      11 Albert Riera   - Been poorly most of this term. We can see he has potential but would like to see him take more of an active role in class
      12 Fabio Aurelio   - very smart turnout. Has had a few chanc es to shine this term. More to come?
      15 Yossi Benayoun  - One of the smallest pupils in the class. Very intelligent and creative
      16 Sotirios Kyrgiakos   - less gifted than some around him but a solid worker
      17 Maxi Rodriguez   a new transfer into the class. Hope to see him make an impact
      18 Dirk Kuyt   a hard worker, never stops trying but we would like to see him be a little more selfish
      19 Ryan Babel   a hard year as he is very withdrawn in class and rarely shows us what he can do. tends to gossip out of class
      20 Javier Mascherano   a mixed start to the term as he didnt know if he would be going to another school. settled now and a solid performer. Bit of a temper
      21 Lucas Leiva   shown massive improvement this year as he has been given more chance to get involved. Can be a star pupil
      22 Emiliano Insua   one of he younger pupils. is growing in confidence in the class
      23 Jamie Carragher   - a senior member of the class, sometimes difficult to understand, an honest worker who may one day teach the class
      24 David NGog   - a little raw round the edges but he is filling out now and is showing occasional glimpses of his potential.
      25 Jose Reina   tends to stay at the back but has no problem in getting his message across. Has often come up with the answers when asked
      26 Jay Spearing   a lovely little lad. could be one for the future
      27 Philipp Degen   had a long illness which held him back but recently has returned to class and is showing good signs of what he can do
      28 Damien Plessis   very quiet as overshadowed by more talented pupils.
      29 Krisztian Nemeth   currently away on an exchange trip. we are getting good reports and so are looking forward to welcoming him back
      30 Charles Itandje   saw himself as the class clown however he has misbehaved and has been warned. Likely to leave the school but who will have him?
      31 Nabil El Zhar   nippy little pupil always running around. we will monitor his progress
      32 Stephen Darby   another local lad with huge potential. Definitely one for the future
      34 Martin Kelly   a young lad who after a couple of wrong answers is well thought of and we hope he will get more chances to shine
      37 Martin Skrtel   less gifted than some but he will always stand his ground and try his best
      39 Nathan Eccleston   early signs of promise so we will work with him
      40 Daniel Ayala   good team member, with more practice will be a useful member of the class
      42 Peter Gulacsi   hardly a peep this year
      47 Daniel Pacheco a pupil with enormous potential. many would like to see him take a more active role in class and get involved earlier on

      CLASS SUMMARY - It has been a difficult year with much of last terms progress not built upon. The teacher has maintained that the class will come through but they are going to have work very hard and do extra hours after schoolto achieve the grade the school govenors want
      MIRO
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #1: Jan 23, 2010 10:48:03 am
      23. Difficult to understand.                         Brilliant!
      19. Has been moved to a special school.





      A fun post this.
      bad boy bubby
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #2: Jan 23, 2010 12:49:18 pm
      Fair play to you Hamps, a bit of time and effort went into that. The "teacher" is very lenient IMO and is bound to pine for the return of corporal punishment tho'.  ;)
      HampshireRed
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #3: Jan 23, 2010 05:13:20 pm
      Fair play to you Hamps, a bit of time and effort went into that. The "teacher" is very lenient IMO and is bound to pine for the return of corporal punishment tho'.  ;)

      I have heard that they have to stay behind after school and do lines if thy misbehave
      Red Barrovian
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #4: Jan 23, 2010 10:01:53 pm
      Very clever and funny post.  :D I'd give the follwing grades.

      Teacher Raphael Benitez - B-
      1   Diego Cavalieri - N/A
      2   Glen Johnson - B+
      4   Alberto Aquilani - C-
      5   Daniel Agger - B-
      8   Steven Gerrard - C+ 
      9   Fernando Torres - A
      11 Albert Riera - D+
      12 Fabio Aurelio - B
      15 Yossi Benayoun - A-
      16 Sotirios Kyrgiakos - B 
      17 Maxi Rodriguez - N/A   
      18 Dirk Kuyt - D
      19 Ryan Babel - F-   
      20 Javier Mascherano - B+ 
      21 Lucas Leiva - B
      22 Emiliano Insua - C
      23 Jamie Carragher - C-
      24 David NGog - B-   
      25 Jose Reina - A+ 
      26 Jay Spearing - N/A   
      27 Philipp Degen - D   
      28 Damien Plessis - N/A   
      29 Krisztian Nemeth - N/A
      30 Charles Itandje - N/A 
      31 Nabil El Zhar - N/A 
      32 Stephen Darby - D 
      34 Martin Kelly - N/A   
      37 Martin Skrtel - D+   
      39 Nathan Eccleston - N/A   
      40 Daniel Ayala - N/A 
      42 Peter Gulacsi - N/A 
      47 Dani Pacheco - C-
      crouchinho
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #5: Jan 24, 2010 12:39:22 am
      Ross
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #6: Jan 24, 2010 12:49:47 am
      Not counting the U of Voronin then?
      David Wright
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #7: Jan 24, 2010 03:36:57 pm
      Very enjoyable and interesting post to read, Need to keep a sense of humour in such a frustrating season. Look forward to a much improved end of term report.
      jindaldhruv
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #8: Jan 24, 2010 03:47:37 pm
      Do we have Harry Potter-like grades?  Babel will get a 'T'- Troll. :P
      LFCBAFC
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #9: Jan 24, 2010 04:33:29 pm
      Teacher Raphael Benitez - A-
      1   Diego Cavalieri - C
      2   Glen Johnson - B+
      4   Alberto Aquilani - C-
      5   Daniel Agger - C+
      8   Steven Gerrard - B- 
      9   Fernando Torres - A+
      11 Albert Riera - D=
      12 Fabio Aurelio - C-
      15 Yossi Benayoun - B +
      16 Sotirios Kyrgiakos - C=
      17 Maxi Rodriguez - N/A   
      18 Dirk Kuyt - C-
      19 Ryan Babel - U   
      20 Javier Mascherano - B+ 
      21 Lucas Leiva - C-
      22 Emiliano Insua - C+
      23 Jamie Carragher - C=
      24 David NGog - C+   
      25 Jose Reina - A+ 
      26 Jay Spearing - N/A   
      27 Philipp Degen - D+   
      28 Damien Plessis - N/A   
      29 Krisztian Nemeth - N/A
      30 Charles Itandje - N/A 
      31 Nabil El Zhar - N/A 
      32 Stephen Darby - D- 
      34 Martin Kelly - C=   
      37 Martin Skrtel - C- 
      39 Nathan Eccleston - N/A   
      40 Daniel Ayala - N/A 
      42 Peter Gulacsi - N/A 
      47 Dani Pacheco - C=
      7-King Kenny-7
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #10: Jan 24, 2010 04:47:45 pm
      Teacher Rafael Benitez - B-
      1   Diego Cavalieri - N/A
      2   Glen Johnson - C
      4   Alberto Aquilani - C-
      5   Daniel Agger - C+
      8   Steven Gerrard - D 
      9   Fernando Torres - A-
      11 Albert Riera - D
      12 Fabio Aurelio - C-
      15 Yossi Benayoun - C+
      16 Sotirios Kyrgiakos - C
      17 Maxi Rodriguez - N/A   
      18 Dirk Kuyt - D-
      19 Ryan Babel - Just do one.   
      20 Javier Mascherano - B 
      21 Lucas Leiva - B
      22 Emiliano Insua - D
      23 Jamie Carragher - D
      24 David NGog - C   
      25 Jose Reina - A* 
      26 Jay Spearing - N/A   
      27 Philipp Degen - D-   
      28 Damien Plessis - N/A   
      29 Krisztian Nemeth - N/A
      30 Charles Itandje - N/A 
      31 Nabil El Zhar - N/A 
      32 Stephen Darby - D- 
      34 Martin Kelly - C   
      37 Martin Skrtel - D 
      39 Nathan Eccleston - N/A   
      40 Daniel Ayala - N/A 
      42 Peter Gulacsi - N/A 
      47 Dani Pacheco - C

      A few may seem harsh but at the end of the day Gerrard and Carragher and a few others have been playing well off par.
      sivapc
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #11: Jan 25, 2010 05:55:05 am
      1   Diego Cavalieri - B-
      2   Glen Johnson - B+
      4   Alberto Aquilani - F
      5   Daniel Agger - B-
      8   Steven Gerrard - C-
      9   Fernando Torres - B+
      11 Albert Riera - C-
      12 Fabio Aurelio - D
      15 Yossi Benayoun - B-
      16 Sotirios Kyrgiakos - B-
      17 Maxi Rodriguez -   
      18 Dirk Kuyt - A*
      19 Ryan Babel - C   
      20 Javier Mascherano - D
      21 Lucas Leiva - A******************** (best player of the decade)
      22 Emiliano Insua - C
      23 Jamie Carragher - C
      24 David NGog - B-   
      25 Jose Reina - A
      26 Jay Spearing - C 
      27 Philipp Degen - C-   
      32 Stephen Darby - C
      34 Martin Kelly - B
      37 Martin Skrtel - C


      42 Peter Gulacsi - N/A
      47 Dani Pacheco - C
      bad boy bubby
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #12: Jan 25, 2010 07:41:02 am

      21 Lucas Leiva - A******************** (best player of the decade)


      Considering the decade is only 25 days old - you wouldn't be too far off, i suppose.  ;)
      SpionKop88
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #13: Jan 25, 2010 09:49:21 am
      SpionKop88
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #14: Jan 25, 2010 10:16:38 am
      Teacher Rafael Benitez - Meticulous teacher who gets his point across, but also known to use substitute teachers for this. C+, no?

      1   Diego Cavalieri   - Has shown some promise when called upon unexpectadly
      2   Glen Johnson   - knows what he has to do, and helps other class members out when needed
      4   Alberto Aquilani  - Late term starter but has shown promise
      5   Daniel Agger   - Moving upto the senior echelons of the class, has passion and a left foot like a former pupil.
      8   Steven Gerrard   - The class prefect, is known to give the class a boost with a single act.
      9   Fernando Torres   - Has just broken a school record, Works well with the Prefect and the rest of the class. Also is a little cheeky when he has to be for the Class to gain an advantage.
      11 Albert Riera   - Had a good last term, but has not been well this term
      12 Fabio Aurelio   - Used to sit near the back of the class, but has worked well from the middle
      15 Yossi Benayoun  - One of the smallest, yet cleverest pupils in the class,
      16 Sotirios Kyrgiakos   - less gifted than some around him but a solid worker
      17 Maxi Rodriguez   Has just moved schools. Expecting Sr Rodriguez to fit in nicely.
      18 Dirk Kuyt   a hard worker, never stops trying but we would like to see him be a little more selfish
      19 Ryan Babel - Has a lot to say but never does it in class. Has been offered to move schools, but doesnt want to. Now he needs to prove why he should stay in class.
      20 Javier Mascherano - Had an up & down start to the term, but is now staying in the school. Sometimes lets the temper get the better of him
      21 Lucas Leiva   shown massive improvement this year as he has been given more chance to get involved. Can be a star pupil
      22 Emiliano Insua - A junior pupil who has shown why he deserves to be in this class, works well from the back
      23 Jamie Carragher   - Deputy prefect who has the ability to become a student-teacher and then one day a Teacher. Works solidly at the back and always gives 100%
      24 David NGog   - Has had a mixed start to the year, but is now showing bits of potential, can be a good student.
      25 Jose Reina - One of the star pupils this term. His passion is unquestioned.
      26 Jay Spearing - Future prefect, has truck loads of ability and not afraid to show it
      27 Philipp Degen - has been medically absent, but has returned and shown what he can do
      28 Damien Plessis   very quiet as overshadowed by more talented pupils.
      29 Krisztian Nemeth - had a good summer school with the class, but on an exchange trip, good reports are coming to the teachers attention.
      30 Charles Itandje - Baffles the governors as to why he still has a locker at the school
      31 Nabil El Zhar - likes to run around, future prospect being monitored
      32 Stephen Darby - as with Spearing, a future prefect
      34 Martin Kelly - young lad who had a shaky start to life in the first class, but now showing his potential
      37 Martin Skrtel - scares pupils from other schools with his solid tackles, has a bit of a temper.
      39 Nathan Eccleston - Shown the teacher glimpses of talent, will be monitored.
      40 Daniel Ayala   good team member, can work hard for the class with a little more experience
      42 Peter Gulacsi - has been in lower classes, but the teachersw assistants have been keeping an eye on him
      47 Daniel Pacheco - has shown why the governrs want to see more of him at the front of the class with Torres, exciting prospect for the Class

      CLASS SUMMARY - Last term left a bench-mark that has, so far not been followed up on (apart from beating the scum school again ;D) but the teacher has promised us governors that the class will be going on more trips next term. Unfortunatly the School is still stuck with d**khead directors.
      Adryan
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #15: Jan 25, 2010 01:18:28 pm
      Liverpool School - Open Day Report

      1   Diego Cavalieri   - Quiet but capable.
      2   Glen Johnson   - New student and has been pretty impressive at the right side of the room. Been missing classes, though.
      4   Alberto Aquilani  - Held back by the teacher he has started to show some promise in recent weeks. Shows his spark of intelligence.
      5   Daniel Agger   - A confident young man who has a passion for body art. Bags of potential and a sweet left foot.
      8   Steven Gerrard   - Class monitor. Local lad who has been stuck in class since he join. Hasn't been as impressive as previous terms but sometimes does his homework ;)
      9   Fernando Torres   - Prettiest of the class. Plagued by illness but still notched up about 12 A's in 19 tests.
      11 Albert Riera   - Has alot of potential but has been missing classes. Hope he decides to come back and make improvements!
      12 Fabio Aurelio   - Good student and is on fire when he's on song.
      15 Yossi Benayoun  - One of the smallest but yet creative pupils of the class.
      16 Sotirios Kyrgiakos   - Pretty solid at the back of the class.
      17 Maxi Rodriguez - A new student. Pretty known worldwide and we'll see how he fares this term.
      18 Dirk Kuyt - Hardest worker of the class. Needs to be more selfish and keep his answers for himself.
      19 Ryan Babel  - Mr.Twitter and DJ. Needs to put more effort into his work.
      20 Javier Mascherano - Mixed start of term and almost transferred schools. Been pretty solid lately.
      21 Lucas Leiva - Isn't as bright as the monitor or others but is capable of doing his part in group works.
      22 Emiliano Insua  - Been kinda laid back this term. Homework not done as well as last term. No worries, still young and shows promises.
      23 Jamie Carragher   - Assistant monitor. Never thought of changing class/school. Shows passion and commitment and may be teacher of the class one day.
      24 David NGog   - Little raw but has got some A's in tests this term. More to see in the future.
      25 Jose Reina  - Consistent performer of the class. Produces the goods when needed.
      26 Jay Spearing - Lovely lad and could be honour student in future just like the Class Monitor.
      27 Philipp Degen - Finally recovered from the measles and has shown potential in recent tests.
      28 Damien Plessis  - Yet to see him more this term. Been very quiet.
      29 Krisztian Nemeth - One for the future. Currently in a transfer programme. Hope to see him take the class my storm soon.
      30 Charles Itandje - Class clown and about to leave the school?
      31 Nabil El Zhar - Relatively quiet and yet to see him answer some questions.
      32 Stephen Darby - A local lad who has loads of potential.
      34 Martin Kelly - Another young student who is progressing.
      37 Martin Skrtel  - Pretty solid at the back but at the same time shaky. Doesn't seem to get many wrong answers.
      39 Nathan Eccleston - Another youngster who has featured in class at one point.
      40 Daniel Ayala - Good enough to do some exercises.
      42 Peter Gulacsi - N/A
      47 Daniel Pacheco - Lots of potential and hopefully we can see more of him.

      Teacher - Rafael Benitez - Sometimes criticised for his methods and techniques but yet comes out on top.

      Overall Grade for Class LFC = B
      Top students - Pepe Reina, Fernando Torres, Glen Johnson
      « Last Edit: Jan 25, 2010 02:30:00 pm by Adryan »
      IrishRed_IO
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      Re: Players Half-Term Report
      Reply #16: Jan 25, 2010 01:44:24 pm
      I like this thread :D

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