Things you would never hear Rafa say..

'I'm not really taking notes, Sammy and I are playing Hangman to relieve our boredom"

"Dear Sir Alex Ferguson is such a cute little teddy bear".

"We are not going to mark zonally today, as I have noticed we concede too many goals this way. no?"

...I am going to play three up front and attack, attack, attack.

"I expect 20 goals from Carragher this season"

Wanna come round for some scran Fergie laaa?

I'm off to Juventus

Ill have a few tins of tenants chilling for me arl pal Moyesey after the game

There are two great sides in Liverpool, Everton and Tranmere.

We expect Rafa wud nver say:"I wish one of those internet managers took my place. Then before, during and after every game I would go and whine about their every decision and say what I would have done. I wud say they attack too much and shud've been more careful. No one thought of this, eh? Never did it to me!"
"Let the first who has never been a coward, who has never muzzled the best strikers and told them to keep clean sheets, throw the first stone. Jose, you're first, throw quick, Sir Manic is waiting!"
(But I can't complain of the players he bought. Just feel stifled by z@fear o'conceding. chelsick&mancheaters can do it coz of bought refs2give'em the fouls zé need)

"I often use a secret email address to put my request for the FAN-tasy stories from the band of Prince Volkyvorta—u know, I tell'em to write what would happen if we had a big-mouth manager, if Liverpool went all out, if so&so owned Liverpool and managed it forcefully, if every1 shouted at refs like Torres, if the fans punished the ref&the board, if they threw bottles and invaded the pitch. Zen they send me the story and tell me no need to publish it, keep it 4urself."
"I have a 200-page file of Sir manic quotes".
"I have buddies in the FA and the League. Watch'm get u! N yeah, my journo pimps, Andy, Stan, Hansen, Lawrenson- and all o'ye, make sure u tell everyone how my team CAN cheat, refs protect me, the FA kowtow to me, and HOW NO ONE can do anything about it! Uh, don't tell'em that fans of old would riot & lynch, just tell'em they're impotent."

N finally "I wish our fans brought bottles to throw instead of beachballs. I wish to make Anfield a real bastion of invincibility. For that, I urge the fans to do everything that Prince Volkyvorta and his hooligan mates preach, to terrorize refs, journo-whores and everyone who just likes football instead of being true Liverpool fans. N I wish I knew where Prince Volkvyvorta is since he's disappeared, he's the Greatest fanatic ever."
I'm looking4ward for, Things Sir Manic wud nver say, SteveBruce fathead, Mourinho, Wenger (I didn't see it)

"I've had enough of this crap"

"im going to have a look on LFCReds.com and see what players the fans want to start the games"

"F**k this, im off to Italy"

"arent them americans a right bunch of wan*ers?"

We expect Rafa wud nver say:"I wish one of those internet managers took my place. Then before, during and after every game I would go and whine about their every decision and say what I would have done. I wud say they attack too much and shud've been more careful. No one thought of this, eh? Never did it to me!"
"Let the first who has never been a coward, who has never muzzled the best strikers and told them to keep clean sheets, throw the first stone. Jose, you're first, throw quick, Sir Manic is waiting!"
(But I can't complain of the players he bought. Just feel stifled by z@fear o'conceding. chelsick&mancheaters can do it coz of bought refs2give'em the fouls zé need)

"I often use a secret email address to put my request for the FAN-tasy stories from the band of Prince Volkyvorta—u know, I tell'em to write what would happen if we had a big-mouth manager, if Liverpool went all out, if so&so owned Liverpool and managed it forcefully, if every1 shouted at refs like Torres, if the fans punished the ref&the board, if they threw bottles and invaded the pitch. Zen they send me the story and tell me no need to publish it, keep it 4urself."
"I have a 200-page file of Sir manic quotes".
"I have buddies in the FA and the League. Watch'm get u! N yeah, my journo pimps, Andy, Stan, Hansen, Lawrenson- and all o'ye, make sure u tell everyone how my team CAN cheat, refs protect me, the FA kowtow to me, and HOW NO ONE can do anything about it! Uh, don't tell'em that fans of old would riot & lynch, just tell'em they're impotent."

N finally "I wish our fans brought bottles to throw instead of beachballs. I wish to make Anfield a real bastion of invincibility. For that, I urge the fans to do everything that Prince Volkyvorta and his hooligan mates preach, to terrorize refs, journo-whores and everyone who just likes football instead of being true Liverpool fans. N I wish I knew where Prince Volkvyvorta is since he's disappeared, he's the Greatest fanatic ever."
I'm looking4ward for, Things Sir Manic wud nver say, SteveBruce fathead, Mourinho, Wenger (I didn't see it)

Am I the only one who's exhausted trying to read all that?

Am I the only one who's exhausted trying to read all that?

No but I'm hoping it well send me to sleep , because I can't work out whether it's Insomnia I'm suffering from or the missus snoring but I've been tossing and turning for the best part of two hours and when I got tempted to to stick the pillow over her face, It was time to get up

"When I count to ten Darryl you will sleep", please Rafa turn up at my door like Paul Mackenna

" im relishing the prospect of linking up with momo sissoko again at Juve"

"Were going to win today, I can feel it in my balls"

i support to RAFA,LIVERPOOL FC can do it!

"Were going to win today, I can feel it in Kuyt's balls"  

Am I the only one who's exhausted trying to read all that?

Nope. 

I lived in Jibber for 7 years RK and became quite fluent in the lingo (especially after a 1ltr of Jack) but redhand speaks a dialect i ain't familiar with. 

"Come back Pako!"

"Come back Pako!"

Don't think we'll ever hear him say "Welcome back LFC-Red, how was your ban ?", I know I've been there myself