1.Neck and shoulders with Jasmine oil = £25
2.As above but Topless with Marigold gloves = £0.50p (you haven't seen me topless)
3.Extras, including- Custard a rubber hose and a Gerbil= £50 and some sunflower seeds for my Gerbil.
Sorry you did say Massages for Rafa?
1.Shave that goatee off for God's sake you look like you've been eating a steak and kidney pie!
2.Get Pako back or failing that someone who you will actually listen to input from.
3.Have the courage to let the team play like you know they can and in fact did when you let them off the leash last season.
4.You have created a wonderful youth academy and young reserves side please believe in them enough to let them have a crack at the first team instead of getting the hangmans noose that is…'Going out on loan!’
5.Stop being so stubborn everyone makes mistakes so if you get a player and I'm mentioning no names here but his name quite aptly rhymes with Mucus!
Who patently is not good enough at least
shoot rest him so hopefully he (whoever he is) can improve by knowing he at least isn't always going to be picked.
6.Shave the goatee off.
7.When you play wingers could you either tell them to stay on the wing or at least attach their left/right leg to a six foot piece of chain so they cant go wandering off?
8.Stop please stop playing anyone and I do mean anyone out of position, it's a waste of the players talent and stops another coming in to stake a claim even if I do realise due to our squad quality it sometimes cant be helped.
9.Stop trying to have a go at other managers you just end up looking a spanner, be dignified and aloof and remain silent and with any luck Fergie will implode on his own venom.
10.Finally I don't know how much sway you have over the catering section but in the Kop block 205 café theres a woman who looks like Nanny Mcphee on a day off and she's scaring the crap out of my son (hes only 25) so if you could shift her to polishing the floodlights I would be grateful.
Although slightly tongue in cheek I would like to add that Rafa still has majority support at Anfield and introducing some of the policies above would in my opinion only serve to enhance that support.
