The year is 2012 and 12 year old bluenose Duncan is talking to his bluenose Dad.
SON "Dad, my mates in school told me that Liverpool won the League Cup for an eighth time - are they right dad?
DAD "Yes son, it's true, but they were dead lucky son, all the way through the tournament"
SON "Why dad?"
DAD "Well in their first match....”
SON "What dad, nice easy home tie?”
DAD "Away to League 1, Exeter, pretty easy really”
SON "Yeah but usually the top teams put out a reserve side and often slip up against that sort of team don’t they? "
DAD "Well true son, but Liverpool put out a strong side and won comfortably".
SON “Oh right, well easier next game then?”
DAD "Championship team this time, Brighton".
SON "Home"
DAD "Away again?"
SON "That doesn’t sound easy?”
DAD "I guess not but they avoided the big guns in the next round too"
SON "Another League one team?”
DAD "Stoke away”
SON "Blimey, not the cliché wet evening game away to Stoke?
".
DAD "Yeah but they were lucky to win it!"
SON "Wasn’t that when Suarez nutmegged the defender before curling it into the corner of the net?"
DAD "Well, anyway, they had Chelsea next"
SON "Home?"
DAD "Away again"
SON "Tough! Was it close?”
DAD "Ermm they missed a penalty but got 2 lucky goals".
SON "Doesn’t sound that lucky. Who did they get in the Semis, easy tie?"
DAD "Man City"
SON "Man City - for crying out loud - what an easy draw - they've won nothing, Everton have won more than them".
DAD "Well they are top of the Premiership and have a squad that cost about a billion but the Red S*&$e managed to beat them away"
SON "Jesus Christ - so Liverpool beat the English Champions elect too"
DAD "Yes son, they ****** well did".
SON "So they had an easy match in the final then?"
DAD "Too right – Cardiff!"
SON “Oh that IS easy!".
DAD "Well son they are going for promotion in the Championship and beat Blackburn and United’s conquerors, Palace, but pretty easy, yes"
SON "So Liverpool walked it then?"
DAD "Actually no, they were 1:0 down at half time".
SON "What happened, how did Liverpool get back into the game?"
DAD "Well Liverpool finally got lucky with one of their 39 shots"
SON "39! Blimey! So what happened next - extra time?"
DAD "Yeah, and Liverpool still couldn’t beat them'"
SON "Then what"
DAD "Penalties!"
SON "English teams are crap at penalties"
DAD "They were! Gerrard and Adam missed their two”
SON "So how come they won? Who did Liverpool have left to take penalties?"
DAD "Well, Kuyt, Downing and Johnson took their last 3".
Son: “Downing and Johnson! Didn’t you say they were rubbish?!”
Dad “Well usually they are, anyway that's how Liverpool became the luckiest team to win the Carling Cup".
SON "So let's get this straight dad - Liverpool had 4 away ties, went to Stoke on a wet Wednesday and won. Beat Chelsea away, then played the most expensive team ever to be assembled.... and beat them away, before coming back from 1-0 down to beat Cardiff in the final?”
DAD "That about sums it up son"
SON "Dad?"
DAD "Yes son"
SON "Can I have a Liverpool shirt for my birthday next week, and again, can you stop calling me Duncan - I'm Stevie from now on!"